We all have goals that we want to achieve. In this post, I’ll consider some of the major problems that stop us from achieving our goals.
Planning
One common problem is the lack of a plan. Sometimes we’re so excited about our goal that we start doing the work without carefully considering what specific work actually needs to be done. This can be very frustrating for highly motivated people. Sometimes we work really hard towards a goal, and still don’t achieve it. We look back at all the time we put in and wonder what went wrong. Sometimes it’s just rotten luck; but often it’s because we started working on a project without properly planning the project. Imagine you’re trying to build a house. You might work really hard with the best of intentions; but if you just start cutting and hammering together bits of wood without first taking measurements and drawing a detailed plan, then you’re not going to produce a stable structure. Before you start, you’ve got to make a plan.
Too Much can be just as bad as Not Enough
Sometimes we spend too much time planning, and never actually start doing the work. Sometimes we just enjoy dreaming about all the possibilities more than we enjoy working towards turning any one possibility into a reality. Sometimes we become fearful, and try to plan for every possible contingency (which is ultimately impossible). At some point, we must declare to ourselves that the plan is good enough, and start trying to execute it. Excessive planning can become a form of procrastination.
Procrastination
Procrastination is one of the most common obstacles to following through. When we say we have trouble getting motivated, we’re often describing a form of procrastination. I recently read a very informative article on The New York Times website titled, “Why You Procrastinate: It has nothing to do with self-control” by Charlotte Lieberman. The article revealed that procrastination is an emotional response to the fear of future discomfort. Sometimes we know that the work we must do is a tedious or unpleasant task; and we begin to experience anticipatory anxiety. Procrastination is an emotional response to an expectation of pain. The avoidance of that pain is instinctive. This is not a time management issue. This is a very common learned behavior. One way to fight this is to intentionally put ourselves through painful experiences: such as physical exercise, cold showers, or uncomfortable social situations. Becoming acclimated to discomfort on a regular basis can help us face discomfort with equanimity. But that’s not what the article recommended.
Forgive yourself: don’t guilt yourself
The article’s recommendations began with self-forgiveness and self-compassion. Practice mindfulness. If you notice yourself procrastinating, acknowledge that behavior for what it is, and even reward yourself for noticing. Then return your attention to the task at hand. Don’t give yourself a guilt trip. Making yourself feel bad about procrastination actually increases the perceived painfulness of the task you’re trying to accomplish, and makes it more likely that you’ll procrastinate again in the future. So don’t feel bad about it! We all procrastinate sometimes. Just acknowledge it, and move on.
One step at a time
Lieberman’s New York Times article had several other useful recommendations: including focusing on the next small step, which is often less daunting than trying to face down a large task or project as a whole. For example, I’m currently working on a rather lengthy software project. I don’t quite know how I’m going to put all the pieces together. If I try to face this unknown, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. But if I simply try to execute the code in my test environment and address the error messages one at a time, I’ll eventually get my code to run error-free.
Make distractions inconvenient
Finally, if there are certain distractions that have become habitual, we may need to make those distractions more inconvenient for ourselves. This can introduce an interruption to our habits, so we’re forced to think about what we’re doing when we engage in those behaviors. For example, if you spend too much time on social media, try uninstalling the app from your phone. The flip side to this is to make it easy and convenient to engage in the behaviors we want ourselves to do. For example, you might work on a laptop or tablet so you aren’t tied to a desk.
Focus on the Goal
For myself, I often find that focusing on my goals is a good motivator. If I focus my attention on the process for too long, I sometimes get bogged down in the details; but when I remind myself of why I am doing this, that can help me get back on task. For example, I’m not spending hours debugging my web application just because I enjoy the tedium and frustration of banging my head on buggy code; I’m spending hours debugging my code because when it’s done my web application will financially reward me for helping other people to solve their problems. So, what’s your “why”? Why do you do the things you do? What is it that you’re working towards? Focus on that goal.
Push Through Discomfort!
And you know, sometimes we all have to do things we don’t want to do, and we just have to push through that. Sometimes we just have to push ourselves. I set a series of alarms in my phone to go off at set intervals every weekday, to remind me to switch tasks and focus on my goals and do the things that need to get done. I write out lists of my goals. Sometimes I tape them inside the door to my kitchen cabinet; sometimes I leave them on 3×5 cards or my notebook; the point is to keep coming back to them. David Goggins recommends writing goals on Post-It notes and sticking them to your mirror. Whatever works best for you, do that, but do it!
Fill Your Mind with Positive Messages
Another way to stay motivated is to read and listen to motivational self-help books, videos, and podcasts. It may seem a little cheesy, but who cares if it’s cheesy? If it makes you feel motivated to get your work done, then that’s the only thing that matters! I find that surrounding myself with the positive messages of self-help books and motivational podcasts can help to drown out the inevitable voices of doubt, both from the dark recesses of my own mind, and from the nasty naysayers in my extended social circle. Positive affirmations and relentless reassurance give me the confidence, self-assurance, and energy to tackle difficult tasks and pursue complex objectives. Guided mindfulness meditations help me to identify which thoughts are helpful and which are distractions. If you’re just getting started on your own journey, just do a YouTube search for speeches by people like Seth Godin and Thich Nhat Hanh. It’s one rabbit hole worth falling down. Best of luck pursuing that. I also have a recommended reading list of some of my favorite self-help books, so browse around those for some titles that I found particularly helpful.
And if you have any tips or techniques you’d like to recommend, leave that in the comments. If you’d like to see more of my tips on setting goals and priorities, check out some of the other blog posts and videos I’ve been releasing lately.
That’s all from me for now, time to go get stuff done. Best of luck out there! Have a great day.
